The Ball and Chain

Today's #dmpad (Diabetes Month Photo a Day) prompt: relationship. So much ran through my head, but I went with a touch of humor (ha, ha- pretend you chuckled, k?) and decided to highlight the love/hate relationship I have with the old ball and chain, my Medtronic MiniMed Paradigm.

It's not new. In fact, it's quite old. But it works. I got it before we were trying to have Cooper and wore it until after Ryder was born (they are now 6 and 4). Took a break until just this last August. And my most recent A1C was down a whole point. (Ya know, from 9 to 8- woo hoo!) :P

Truth: (because, remember, that's kinda why I'm even here) It's hard to tell if the pump is really a good thing for me. It's good for convenience. Nice to have insulin right with me anytime. So that I can dose after I eat and all.

Ok, ok, ok... I don't wanna just be disparaging about myself and therein make my complacency a good thing. I want to be able to joke about how awesome I'm doing, leaving a trail of test strips wherever I go type thing.

But for now, it's true, my pump is abused. Or better said, I abuse pump therapy. I don't want to have that print out my endo gets tell him how many carbs I just ate, so I dose manually instead of using the wizard. Or I've only tested once a day like usual, so there is not BG number to input anyway. Or I realize I just ate something random and there goes an easy bolus again.

My favorite thing about it, beyond the ease and access, is that it reminds me to test. Here's another truth: when I test my blood sugar, everything improves from there. I know that testing is the key for me. I don't react weirdly to carbs or drop like a rock for no reason (knock on wood). If I test, I can change and improve how my day goes, how my life looks, what my future holds.

So for now, despite standing up and walking away without realizing the pump is being left behind, or catching my tubing on yet another cupboard knob in my kitchen and ripping my site out, or the crazy $700 charge for one box of supplies that will only last 6 months, I'll choose love over hate with the pump. With any luck... or maybe it's effort... My next A1C will keep dropping and I'll see another 7 for the first time in few years ;)

Thanks for reading! Even if only a few of you are seeing this, it's feeling good to do on this end :)

Sky